After multiple swipes and flaccid conversations over text, I finally settled on “The Architect”. This was going to be date No. 1. This was going to be THE date that will launch me into an unexpected journey of self reflection and realization (cue in dramatic music and sounds).
Fast forward to Friday night and I find myself making plans with friends to meet up after this date, and assuming that I will need a valid excuse to leave early. As I turn the corner to enter Hot Bird’s patio, I see a tall and lanky figure come towards me. He mutters my name inquisitively and I awkwardly agree, “yup, are you (insert anonymous name here)?”
The ungracefulness of the hug that followed was tragic. He was tall… REALLY tall. So tall, that as he wrapped his arm around me, my head nestled neatly into his armpit. He had glasses and, from what I saw, a good sense of style. Though he carried a slight sense of arrogance, he was pleasant.
The conversation started with the typical interview questions: Where are you from; How long have you been here; and What brought you to the greatest city in the world? For the sake of carrying on the conversation, I must admit that I was probing. There were a few moments where I stumbled on my words because my eyes began to wander from boredom. Unfortunately, I have yet to master the I’m-very-interested-in-what-you-have-to-say look. My eyelids embarked on a difficult task to stay open and the bags under them enlarged as I squinted to stay focused.
I was fighting an internal dialogue, “Do not lose eye contact. Stay focused. Maybe you should leave now? I wish I could teleport out of here. How do I end this conversation? What did he just say about not being an architect?”
I’m sorry, what now?
Backtracking a little bit, I politely asked him to clarify. He explained that although he told me that he was an architect when we were texting, he confirmed that he was not actually an architect. The nature of his work allows him to interact with these professionals, however, he himself was not one.
I suppose that’s the beauty of tinder – you can fib about yourself to make yourself appear more interesting. Look, if it means gaining you a swipe then I say – WHY THE HELL NOT?