Sunday morning. Skies are blue. Birds are chirping. It’s cold as shit. I’m not hungover. Sounds like the perfect day for a COFFEE DATE!!! Never been on one of these before, but how could it possibly be bad? One drink + sunshine = efficiency. I get my caffeine, vitamin D, and date all checked off at once.
This guy was hot in his Bumble pics. He only had two- at the beach with his “sister” and playing tennis in an all white get-up (just to be clear, his clothes weren’t the hot part, his face was). He actually really looked like someone who lived in my college dorm that my roommate was madly in love with senior year but never actually pursued. Turns out, she’s part of this challenge, too. Suck it betch. But I digress…
I didn’t really know anything about this person other than that he lives 1.6 miles away from me and knows the difference between your and you’re. But I’m excited! The first date of The Challenge that isn’t approached with dread- THIS is what it’s all about.
We decided to meet at a coffee shop on the NW corner of Central Park at 1:00. I get there at 1:00 and sit in the February chill in my cute-but-cold coat because all the inconsiderate Columbia students are taking up the entire cafe. Oh, you have a thesis to write?? I’m in a dating challenge, so my work here is obviously more important. Just kidding. I fully support higher education and all the work that entails. I am also well aware that finding a seat in a cafe within walking distance from a university on a Sunday is like seeing a unicorn barf cronuts onto the Loch Ness Monster. It doesn’t happen.
He walks over about 15 minutes later and hubba, hubba. I’m so into it. Yeah, he was late, but I liked him anyway. He had a great smile. I’ve never dated anyone who comes anywhere close to being as smiley as me and I was already looking forward to our next date. We ordered; he laughed when I took a Hydro Flask out of my purse to fill up with black coffee. And we decided to take a walk through the park.
The conversation was great. He asked a ton of questions about my job (teacher) and was genuinely eager to hear about my experiences with kids in the city. He’s getting his MBA from Columbia. He graduated from a school in Canada with an engineering degree but wants to take over his dad’s civil engineering company, so it was off to business school in the states for him. We walked around for about an hour before sitting on a bench in the sun, trying to thaw out.
Oh, I forgot to mention that I had a vampire facial the day before. Yeah, one of those facials Kim K did in that gif. The process is cool and it’s helping a lot with my acne scars BUT it makes your skin peel like a bitch for a couple days and you can’t put anything but hyaluronic acid on your skin. So I was wearing a baseball hat and big ass sunglasses the whole time and my cheeks were red and peel-y. I didn’t think about it the entire date until we sat down face to face. Oh, well. If the conversation’s still going strong, he obviously doesn’t care and neither should I, but I still brought it up before parting ways.
I’m wearing a hat because I had a scar removal procedure done yesterday. I’m not trying to be creepy and not let you see my face.
What? Oh, hahah! I didn’t even notice!
I just don’t want to get sunburned and look even scarier for my students.
You could never look scary.
I could if someone threw acid on me.
Yeah….Well, I had a really nice time! Are you busy this week? I’d like to see you again. Maybe get some drinks with alcohol in them? hahah
Oh, you didn’t spike your coffee, too? ….(Moment of awkward silence) But yeah, definitely! I’d love to get drinks this week. Are you free on Tuesday?
Ahh. I have a dinner Tuesday, but it’s early. Maybe drinks after? I’ll let you know tomorrow.
Okay, perfect. See you soon!
And that was it. No kiss. No hug. Just a dorky grin that spread across my face as I walked back through the park blowing up the group chat.